Shoplifting

I needed to get out of the house this evening, and D wanted some quality time with the girls (such a good daddy) so I headed out for some "me" time.  I got some dinner at Pei Wei and went for my typical me time Target run. Why?  Because Target is my night club.  I was looking at belts and wondering which size to get so I slipped a few around my waist and and decided on one and stuck it in the cart.  Approximately 30 seconds later I had red shirts all over me (Target lingo for sales associates).  They were watching me out of the corner of their eye, peeking around end caps and asking me if I needed help.  They thought I was shoplifting!

I know how to spot a shoplifter, I've worked in retail at the most shoplifted store ever (in my opinion), Gap.  Let me tell you about shoplifters.  They are teenage girls, ghetto girls with empty shopping bags, girls with shifty eyes, girls with giant pregnant bellies and a thong hanging out the back of their skin tight see through white PINK sweatpants, teenage boys in an emo phase (you know who you are!)... I am none of these.  Another big clue that I'm not a shoplifter is that I had the merchandise IN THE CART!

After about a half hour of wandering the store looking at all the cute C and G clothes, mommy shoes, books, pink valentines plates, etc., I was in the toy aisle checking out the Leapster games for C's birthday coming up.  A teenage male red shirt came up and asked if I needed anything.  His face was really red like he was super nervous and I couldn't help myself, I started asking him really in-depth questions about the Leapster games: "How much does Dora really speak Spanish in this one?", "Does this Tinkerbell game have all the same fairies that were in the movie?", "Which game focuses the most on math?".  He was sweating big time.  He said "uhhhhh.  I don't know."  And ran.

They still watched me- but from a distance- and that was fine with me.  I made my point: don't talk to me.  At the exit there was a red shirt with a security guard and I was praying they would stop me so I could really lay into them.  But they didn't.  Bummer. 

My me time was good tonight.  I got my belt, was home by 9:30, kids were in bed, kitchen clean, D watching hockey.  It's going to be a good weekend.